Broken

I am not good at sitting still. I like to get out of the house a lot, you know just be out participating in…things. Unfortunately over the last year I have injured myself pretty badly a couple times forcing me to do a whole lot of sitting still. My major injury was a broken collar bone. I was run over at home plate playing slow pitch softball (it’s competitive, what can I say?) I instantly knew it was broken the minute I tried to sit up and move. After the x-rays confirmed my suspicions I was referred to an orthopedic surgeon. I was given options. There was a 50/50 chance of it healing on its own. So I could go home and sit for 6 weeks and pray the bone fused back together or I could go in for surgery and have a metal plate put in. I opted for option 1; the thought of having metal in my body wasn’t that appealing so I was going to take my chances. Here was the catch, I couldn’t move at all for 6 weeks. I was to sleep in a recliner and try not to stand up only doing so when absolutely necessary. So for 6 tortuous weeks I did nothing. I missed our youth summer camp and pretty much everything else summer had to offer during that time. So the day finally came when I was to return for the new on whether or not I had healed. I went in and got the worst news possible, there was 0% bone growth. The sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach was caused by 2 things: 1. I now have to go in for surgery and have metal plate installed in my body. 2. I JUST WASTED 6 WEEKS! So Surgery was scheduled and I went in for the procedure. 3 days later I went in for a post op appointment and my doctor said it was time to start moving it. I now currently have a metal plate and 10 screws in my left shoulder.

I got to thinking about physical injury and it dawned on me how it parallels the emotional injury that we encounter so regularly with students. We recognize that students are injured emotionally so we tell them that they need to pull themselves from the behaviors that they regularly exhibit and by stopping doing those things they will be healed. Stop partying, we say, don’t drink or have sex. And, we are correct in saying those things, teenagers are constantly doing things to hurt themselves not know they are doing them because they are hurt. But the cure isn’t just stopping bad behavior.

In the same way a physician who specialized in taking the broken pieces of my bone and put them back together stepped in and did what I couldn’t do on my own, students need to have an encounter with Jesus the great physician to take the broken pieces of their lives and emotions and help do what they can’t do on their own, heal. We can’t just hope that by taking students and sitting them down and removing them from everything that we will somehow create life change. We have to introduce them to a loving God who specializes in healing the broken.

“ouchie”

I have two children, a 4 year old girl and a 2 year old boy. The occurrence of injury in my home right now is almost uncountable. My son in particular seems to find ways daily to hurt himself. Whether it be running around a corner too fast and having His feet come out from under Him, falling down some stairs, biting His lip or hitting himself in the head with whatever toy he has in his hand. Several times a day I hear the familiar sound of screaming followed either by whimpering or, depending on the severity of the injury, nothing because he is doing the mouth open no air movement paralyzed cry.

Every time this happens I stop what I am doing and run to see if he is ok. I need to know how bad he is hurt. I need to make sure it isn't anything that will require a hospital visit. So I rush over pick him up and ask him what happened. I hold him close tell him I am sorry and that everything is going to be ok. Then I will blow cool air on a scrape or ask him if he wants me to kiss his "ouchie". I stay with him until he is ok and ready to go play again.

There are young people all over the country and in our youth ministries that are hurting. Some of them are in situations where they feel beat up and in pain. Some are hurt so bad that they are paralyzed with the pain. They are crying out for someone to run to them and see if they are ok. They need someone to show them the love that they are desperate for. Someone to help ease the pain they feel. Someone to hold them close and tell them everything is going to be ok.

Most of us would love to help, as long as they come to us. We expect them to come into the doors of our churches and look for someone to help them. We think the answer is fancy youth centers and game rooms. For some reason we believe what hurting people really need is an Xbox.

People always marvel at stories of people who cut their arm off with a chainsaw and drive themselves to help. That is a huge acception to the rule. I have heard many Pastors and Youth Pastors call their churches "hospitals for hurting people" here is my question: Where are the ambulances?

In the same way I run to my children to make sure they are ok we have to run to hurting young people to make sure they are ok. Youth have been deeply injured emotionally and spiritually and for many it is life threatening. Let's go get them and bring them in so that they can be healed by the one true healer.

 

Getting Your Hands Dirty

When I was 14 I went and spent the summer with my grandparents in Montana. My grandpa is a hard working guy. He made his living owning trailer parks. Not only did he own them but he maintained them as well. So my summer was to be spent working for Grandpa doing whatever task he had for me. One time we were out at a property and some sewage had backed up and the only way to stop it was to turn a valve that was down in this disgusting liquid. I got a stick and tried to poke around down in there. I looked around for some sort of tool that would reach down and turn a valve but I could find nothing. Finally my Grandpa, after I am sure having a chuckle and getting frustrated, finally just said “Greg, get in there and get your hands dirty”. Here is the deal while the thought of reaching my hand down into sewage was in no way appealing to me there was a larger issue. See at the time New Kids on the Block were the hottest thing and they wore the coolest jeans that were ripped to shreds. I had worked all summer on a pair of jeans wearing holes down in them because Lord knows my parents weren’t buying any with the holes already in them. Reaching down into the sewage risked getting poop water on my NKOTB pants. Long story short: ruined pants.




See the thing about getting your hands dirty is that it puts everything else at risk of getting dirty too. An itch on your nose, a shirt that needs pulled down, something you need in your pocket all put you in a position to spread whatever is on your hands to everywhere else.



As Youth Ministers I think we are called to get our hands dirty in the lives of the young people we are trying to reach. To get elbow deep into those issues that face them and tackle them side by side together, to truly get involved in the lives of students. How many of your students do you truly know? Do you know where they live? What their home situation is like? How much a part of their lives are you? What number phone call are you when they get into trouble? The more involved you get the deeper your hands get.



Dirty hands aren’t negative thing it’s what gets the job done. I think we often look around for tools to try and poke around in the lives of young people instead of just reaching in and getting our hands dirty.



But, why is it hard to do that? For the same reason I didn’t want to reach into the sewage, the ripple effect that it may cause to the rest of us. Getting our hands dirty in a young person’s life might get smudged onto our time. We may get a little of their lives into our privacy. We don’t mind doing a little work as long as we can keep the rest of us clean. It is so important to remember that effective change may require some sacrifice on our part. Youth Ministry isn’t done in clean rooms with Hazmat suits on and robotic arms. If you want to create effective change roll up your sleeves and get your hands dirty.



We need to look at the end result of our work and not how to keep our trendy jeans clean.

Prove It: the reason behind the title

Prove it: The attitude of the current generation attending youth ministries today. My generation (gen-X) was all about everything being big and extreme. We lived for the big event and camps were where our lives were changed. Things have changed. Big flashy events still bring youth in but they don’t stay. Pastors and Youth Speakers used to stand on stages and compel students to change their lives with powerful thought provoking sermons. Altars still get filled by guilty teens but lives are rarely changed.




Why?



The answer is simple. “Because, I told you so” doesn’t work anymore. Youth in this day and age want you to prove it. “There is power in prayer? prove it” “God can change my life? prove it” and most common “You care about me? prove it”.



It has been said for years “people don’t care what you know until they know that you care.” We tend to neglect that concept in youth ministry though. Truly believing that the sermon we have for our Wednesday night service is going to set lives on fire. Sure we get to know a few students the ones we like or the ones we see the potential in to become ministers or leaders. We joke around with them and play dodge ball with them during our annual lock-in. But what about the kid who causes you trouble during service, the one who starts fights in the hallways, the one you catch with drugs, do you really believe that the sermon you worked on is for them? I mean c’mon they aren’t listening anyway.



If I were to walk up to you on the street, a complete stranger, and tell you that your hair cut was terrible and you needed to immediately go get it cut or styled because you have terrible style, what would you say? Get away from me? Leave me alone? You don’t know me? You have no right to talk to me? Probably something similar to that. But, isn’t that we do every week, stand on a stage and tell students their lives are screwed up and they need to immediately change them? Yet we are surprised when we don’t see change. Why? Do you know them? Do you have the right to tell them they need to change? Better yet, have you earned the right to tell them they need to change?



Throughout my years in youth ministry a shift has taken place. Youth today want you to prove it and the number one thing they want you to prove is that you care. If you want to be an effective youth pastor or leader take the time to get to know your students. Don’t just get to know about their lives, become a part of their lives. Earn the right to speak into their lives about the things they need to change.



In the age of social networking where people are using every outlet necessary to personally connect with other people it is hugely important to personally connect with today’s youth.



So, you say you want to change this generation: Prove IT.